Good Lite Cafe

Dont Take'em Home 'Til ya Gettem in the Good Lite! Good Lite Cafe'.."

Daily Specials:

Barbeque Pork Chops or Fried Chicken
Collard Greens, or Boiled Cabbage
Grits with Cheese or Institutional Mashed potatoes
Your choice of tasty beverage.

All this week, Ms. Viola has crumble cake, New York Style Cheesecake, and Pecan Pie AlaMode. (that's with vanilla ice cream on top) Stay tuned as next week she's rolling out somthing special!

Open Late Nites and Weekends.

Please try to stay on the plastic runners

Swampfront Patio dining with your hostess, Miss Kitty

We are located at the Corner of Floodline Road and High Water Pass (Alabama route 69)here in Bug Tussle, Alabama just west of Smith Lake. (coming soon: Hot Coffee, MS)Please do not try to call ahead because our telephone is for emergencies and credit card transactions only and it only works sometimes because one of us forgets to pay the bill. Carry out orders are welcomed but not encouraged. We seat on a First Come First Served Basis. And no, we do not accept personal checks, thank you! Actually, due to a sudden rush of counterfitting going on around these parts, we really don't like cash either, but Hey! Whatcha gonna do!Our News Blog is a public service to the good folks of Greater Bug Tussle, Cold Springs, Dodge City, Colony, and Bremen.Out of Towners Please note: If we do not recognize you, we are likely to gawk at you as if you were a Carnival Freak or a two-assed monkey at the Jimmy Morgan Zoo.

We Encourage Nutritious Meals For Children.*

Parking now available again!! But you may still choose to park down the road there at your own risk**. A flock of birds has taken up residence and recently some cars parked there have been peppered with all manner of droppings. Also, because of the soggy summer, the road takes a steep dog-leg around the sinkhole while the county tries to find something to fill it up.

*And while all that is very true, we ask that you do not bring-em up in here unless they are your date and we do celebrate Sunday's after Church, so bring them in then.

Our permanent Children's menu: (served only between 4:00a.m. and 4:00p.m. Monday through Sunday.

Cheerios Capn Crunch
Eggs and cheese
Grilled cheese sandwiches
Chicken fingers with fries
Mini-burgers with a pickle and fries
Juice
Milk
Water
Decaf tea***
Each childs meal comes with a choke proof toy that has been lab tested by Junior cause he has a bad gag reflex.

**The road, It takes a dog leg, as you know and it seems to have taken other legs as well. If you are missing one, consult the lost and found pages in this site.

***After all the kids a pingin' around out here, it got dangerous, one little tyke's momma-n-nem didn't pay attention and the little fool knocked a hole in his head.So we switched to decaf and we no long serve the little bastards soft-drinks or coffee, either.

OUR Core Values

At Good Lite Cafe, we think people should feel special. We also think people should inspect their mates carefully under bright lighting before making any regrettable mistakes. We suggest you start with an inspection of your potential mate's teeth and gums, and then ask for a copy of their family tree. If it only has one branch (the trunk) you might wanna reconsider, or order a tasty alcoholic beverage. One should not be held responsible at times like those.

Alcohol is however, provided compulsory if it appears you are going to engage your guest, despite how tragic it may become. We figure you'll need a little desensitizing.

We provide over five kinds of finer beers. Schlitz, Milwaukees best, Milwaukees best lite, Bush Beer, and Budweiser and for the high falutin palet, Michelob lite. We offer many other beers pictured below:

It takes a while to go get you one cause we have to keep it in Coon creek, cause our beer cooler has been on the fritz. We just hope the county don't come around before we can get it fixed. It could happen anytime, cause somebody has been reporting a sudden rash of drunk raccoons down at Hinkey's Farm on Hyatt Gap road.

Essentially, we have only one motto because we are just plain folks around here.

Since we do not like rudeness around here we ask that you please: GET OVER YOURSELF BEFORE EVERYONE ELSE DOES!

Today's Public Service Announcement:

For Blonder Blonde's Hairstylists recommend Miss Clairol's beautiful "Legally Blonde" for touch ups and and highlights. Brought to you by Faye's Cut, Color and Curl's new location in Drummond Switch, Alabama. That's just about Four miles over that ridge as the crow flies, But you'll have to drive about 20 miles Down Empire road and turn right on Drummond Switch Cutoff. Right next to Higgins Ceramics.

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PLEASE NOTE: THIS WEBSITE IS ABOUT FICTITIOUS PEOPLE IN ALL TOO REAL PLACES. FACES AND NAMES HAVE BEEN CHANGED TO PROTECT THE GUILTY. MOST ROADS AND LOCATIONS ARE REAL PLACES, BUT THE PLACES OF BUSINESS ARE NOT. ( WITH THE EXCEPTION OF POETIC LICENSE AND IF YOU KNOW WHAT IS FICTION AND WHAT IS NOT, WELL I GUESS YOU'VE BEEN THERE AND WE LOVE YOU AND WE SUPPORT YOU IN THAT!). PLEASE DO NOT SEND RESUME'S, BUT QUESTIONS ARE WELCOMED. IF YOU ARE OFFENDED WE SUGGEST THE BOOK OF ROMANS CHAPTER 1 VERSE 1 AND CONTINUE TO READ UNTIL THE BOOK IS OVER. IF YOU STILL HAVE QUESTIONS PLEASE E-MAIL JUNIOR FOR CLARIFICATION. WE RESERVE THE RIGHT TO ANSWER THEM TO OUR FULLEST CAPABILITIES AND INCLUDE THEM IN THIS SITE.All enclosed characters are totally ficticious and any similarities in real life are tragic and to be avoided, therefore this website.

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